With your help there is a burden in my heart with no love for this world,
for I have been living in the most sinful city, and my eyes have not been deceived.
Please help me to not go through all the misleading,
before I’m trapped into the worst guilt on my keens I’ll be pleading.
With your promises and love I’ll keep my eyes shut,
but my tears fall on my cheeks because every day is a different day,
scared I’ll be different from yesterday. Feeling the shaadan on my case,
Alhamduilah with your words I can fight it away.
Please don’t make all the years be a waste with one night of sin I’ll become a hypocrite,
how could I betray you, I’m so sorry with my tears and fear I’ll prostrate to you,
I own you many prayers many deeds to you, how can I neglect you,
my stupidity how could I throw my Iman out of the window, living in the state of hollow,
searching out there for happiness and I should of known there is no happiness without you,
if I’m not praying I don’t have you. To me sinning doesn’t come so easy,
but with anger I pushed myself, hating myself, is there any way of justifying myself.
Hiding what you gave me I put it away as if it were shame, not accepting your gift,
denying everything you had done for me, I’m so sorry, please could you have it within you, and forgive me.
With your miracles and the blessings of my heart still beating,
for my eyes are still blinking thank you for believing in me,
I’m ready to change now more than ever, I want what you’ve promised for the hereafter,
please make my journey and for those who I love for it to be easy.
The gates of heaven I wish to see, fantasying ,
I ponder and I wonder inshallah I could reach,
and feel the lightness off my shoulders the beauty and the description I could only capture,
but whatever my imagination tries to display, I can’t drift off this beauty hasn’t been witness by my eyes.
With your promises, I’m at ease and with your love this world I can tolerate for another day,
with your promises I know there is more than this,
and that this isn’t the end of the book but it will only continue in the next chapter.
And if I promise to better myself because I wish to please you and I want to make you proud,
if I’m dying and the time is almost coming please help me encourage me to utter the words of the shahada,
for the death of my pain become lighter than a feather, and therefore I’ll be with you and with those I love,
this world, shadan and the kafir have nothing to offer, with the promises and Love, I’ll love you more my creator........ Allah (SW).
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