I remember crawling under bed
Running outside in the middle of the night
Seeking comfort in friendly enemies
All in the hopes of avoiding you.
I remember crying to bed night and again
Praying hard for help
My 10 year old mind asking
Why God isn't here yet
I cried and sobbed
I rebelled and hated
All in the hopes of numbing
The scars caused by you.
I remember finding comfort
In inflicting physical pain
All in the hopes of ceasing the emotional
And mental torture
I remember not trusting
I remember the shame
I remember hating and blaming
I remember everything....
But most of all
I remember the fact that you
Have never apologies for your actions
And, although that would never change
The pain you caused me over the years
It would at least tell me
You are ashamed of your actions
That you were wrong
And, that you are seeking my forgiveness
For imprinting stubborn scars on my heart, forever.
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